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December 2009 -------
Welcome to the Birth Order newsletter December 2009 Birth Order Depression Each of the Birth Orders has its own type of depression. These types of depression are based on hidden feelings of fear, sadness, shame, stupidity and loneliness. Because these feelings are hidden from themselves the Birth Orders experience them as depression. The Only child learns to hide fear as a child. During childhood the Only is the focus of attention by parents and others so that when this child experiences fear the parents and others become uncomfortable, doing what they can to alleviate the fear. The child comes to believe that fear is unacceptable so it has to be hidden when it cannot be turned off. The fear goes into the subconscious where it becomes Only Child depression that keeps her from doing things. The First Born learns to hide sadness as a child when the baby comes home. Losing mother?s attention to the baby makes the First Born feel sad, a feeling he soon learns is unacceptable because mother has to take care of the baby. Unable to turn the sadness off the First Born learns to hide the sadness not only from others but from self. The sadness goes into the subconscious where it becomes First Born depression that keeps him from being happy. The Second Born learns to hide shame as the First Born outdoes the Second Born. The Second Born learns to hide the shame from others and self as she is told ?you?ll do better when you get older.? The hidden shame becomes Second Born depression that does not let her enjoy success. The Third Born learns to hide a feeling of stupidity imposed on him by the Second Born. The Second Born has to do better than the Third Born by making the Third Born look incompetent or, in other words, stupid. The hidden feeling of stupidity becomes depression that makes the Third Born become fearless to hide it. The Fourth Born learns to hide a feeling of loneliness imposed by the older children who want to keep from having to include him. If the Fourth reveals loneliness the older children reject the child even more so the child has to hide the loneliness from them and even from self. The hidden loneliness becomes depression that does not allow the Fourth Born to relate well to others. There is hope! Check out the anti-depressant therapy at http://www.birthorderplus.com. Happy Holidays!
Rev. Cliff Isaacson, BA, BD
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The following books by Cliff are available by mail.
The Birth Order Challenge Hardback $19.95
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